For Steph... (pt. 1)

...since she is one of the only ones that read this. in all actuality, its not really for Steph but we had a convo about my blog recently...well, whatevs...

anyways, if anyone IS actually reading this, there are gonna be like 2 or 3 posts in a row...deal with it! sorry

as of recent, ive realized something about myself. and i cannot give a legit reason as to why this happens...but, oh well. i have this habit of becoming completely infatuated with things. i let if completely consume my everyday life and i end up wasting valuable time (lets just call this "Topic #1").

it doesnt matter whether its music, a tv show, a person, whatever; i cant help but just being focused on one noun (person, place, or thing). for example (and i know others have noticed), whenever one of my favorite musical artists come out with a new cd, i cant help but to put that shit on repeat (even tho, i do feel like i have a pretty good opinion on what good music is).  i'll play that shit nonstop for like 3 weeks. i'll also create a lot of music in a certain category for a long while if im into it. last year i spent a whole month on a single song just because i was into that style at the moment (and i was super sick...i also watched a whole season of Heroes in like...less than a week).

however, its not just music. i do this with everything. especially when it comes to women...well, as of recent. i seem to get caught up on one girl and then, in the longrun, i realize that it was all a waste of time. i mean, im one of those people that only acts on certain emotions and impulses. maybe its just my logic being off for some reason or a another, but this isnt doing any good for anybody. the longer this stage seems to last, the more time i end up wasting.

i mean, i feel like i have a leg up on the situation since im noticing it (the first step is admitting you have a problem). id like to think that im logical (there goes that word again...) enough to notice my faults and try to build off of them. but, who knows? maybe its just what im supposed to do? maybe it runs in my family (i mean, god knows they've made several mistakes)? idk, i just know that im growing from it whether or not i notice it immediately.